Text Quotes and Text Messages 0472 – 0485: Dirty Tagalog Text Jokes

Filed Under Tagalog Text Jokes 

These Tagalog Text Jokes were emailed to me by a friend. Wala yata magawa hehe

0472. Bakit natatakot bumaba ang mga babae sa jeep sa kanto ng TINIO st, sa San Pablo?
Answer: Kasi ang sigaw ng driver “O yun bababa, KANTO TINIO NA”!!!!!

0473. Bata : Tay paglaki ko gusto ko katulad mo.
Tatay: Ang bait ng anak ko, gusto rin maging doctor.
Bata : Hindi tay!! gusto ko rin tirahin si YAYA!!!

0474. DALAWANG LASING ANG SABAY UMIHI.

Lasing 1 : Pare, sobra ang tigas ng TITI ko, Uuwi na ako at yayariin ko muna si Misis.
Lasing 2 : Sasama ako sa iyo.
Lasing 1 : Baket?
Lasing 2 : E, sa akin ang yang hawak mong TITI eh !!!!
More Tagalog Text Jokes….
0475. After having sex, panay pa rin hawak ng girl sa organ ng lalaki..
BOY: Gusto mo pa ulit ?
GIRL: Hinde… Namimiss ko lang.. Meron kasi ako nito dati ehh…

0476. INA: Hindi ba bilin ko sayo, kapag hinipuan ka ng bf mo sa dede say DONT! Kapag sa pepe say STOP! Bakit nabuntis ka ?
ANAK: Sabay po kasi hinipo eh,. kaya sabi ko DONT STOP !

0477. Nakakasalat
Sakristan: Father, may libangan din ba ang mga Pari?
Pari: Oo, naman, pag dating ng hapon, kaming mga pari dito sa bayan ay naglalaro ng Mahjong.
Sakristan: Bakit po naman Mahjong pa ang napili niyong laro?
Pari: Kasi, dito lang kami nakakasalat ng flower, Iho!

0478. Boy Libog sees his mon licking his father’s balls
BOY LIBOG : Ano gawa mo mommy?
MOM : Kain lang mommy ng bola bola
BOY LIBOG : Takaw naman ni mommy. may bola bola na may lumpia pa!!!

0479. Boy LIbog sees his wife giving birth to their child.
WIFE: Hoy, tulungan mo ako dito!
Boy Libog came ang struck his penis inside his wife.
BOY LIBOG: Anak, KAPIT !!!

0480. WOMAN to DOC: Thank you for making me a virgin again for my wedding night. It was perfect, the blood, the pain ang it only cost 50pesos! How did you do it?
DOC : I tied your PUBIC hair together!

0481. KUMARE 1: Nag-away kami ng pare mo kasi gusto niya sa sex dog style
KUMARE 2: What’s wrong with that?
KUMARE 1: Eh gusto niya na naman sa DAAN din!

0482. In a rape trial, the vixtim was asked by a lawyer: Did you scream for help?
LADY : Yes sir.
LAWYER: Did anyone came?
LADY: Yes sir….he did… then I did

0483. STUDENT : Mam, how can we get BETACAROTENE?
TEACHER : Manood ka ng beta, kumain ka ng carrot, tapos humawak ng OTEN

0484. sa math class:
ryan:ARAY!!bakit ka ba naniniko??
raul: ayaw mo magpakopya kasi..
ryan:sumbong kita kay teacher,MAM SI RAUL PO NANINIKO!!!!
TEACHER: RAUL “ALAM MO BANG MASAKIT ANG MANIKO”?
raul:YEHEY!!WALANG PASOK NGAYON MASAKIT DAW MANI NI MAM!!!!

0485. WOMAN to DOC: Thank you for making me a virgin again for my wedding night. It was perfect, the blood, the pain ang it only cost 50pesos! How did you do it?
DOC : I tied your PUBIC hair together!

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Disclaimer: All Quotations, Jokes and Messages contained here are either received through SMS, E-mail or contributed through comments, and remain the intellectual property of their respective originators

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Comments

25 Responses to “Text Quotes and Text Messages 0472 – 0485: Dirty Tagalog Text Jokes”

  1. KHAWENG on November 3rd, 2008 11:45 am

    ANG SAYA NAMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

  2. minions on January 13th, 2009 11:39 pm

    published more jokes…… i like it.l.

  3. marry jhoy on February 2nd, 2009 8:01 pm

    nakakatawa tlga mga qoutes nyo pwde dagdagan nyo pa jejeje

  4. Jr J. cudilla on February 18th, 2009 3:56 am

    mORE JOKES.. SOBRANG GUSTO KO KASI…HAHAHAHA!

  5. jordan on March 27th, 2009 10:38 am

    oi wala nba mas maganda pa jan ang papanget ng quotes nyu ta3

  6. nicole.baretto on June 5th, 2009 4:53 am

    boooring !

  7. lyka on June 13th, 2009 9:30 pm

    kalokohan..harhar

  8. bacuZ on July 14th, 2009 6:37 am

    hahahaha! kaka alis naman ng problemea
    ang galing damihan nyu pa jowk nyu!

  9. lhen on July 29th, 2009 11:45 pm

    very funny!!!!

  10. raven on August 5th, 2009 5:00 am

    bast0s nmn!

  11. rHasTa on August 5th, 2009 5:49 am

    enjoy Poh mga quoTes,
    saya tangaL mga pRob q…
    tNx…
    ^_^

  12. Junpyo on August 7th, 2009 4:40 am

    Grabi ang adik sa s ex…

    hahahahahaha^^

  13. nce guy on September 17th, 2009 4:31 am

    nice joke puro kalibugan yan ha:))
    lanabuh nakakbitin nmn ung joke nio dagdagan nio nmn nxtym ha ung mas nakakalibog ha
    hahahaah

  14. mhar on September 23rd, 2009 4:53 am

    nakakatawa,gravh

  15. hanickah khim .. on September 28th, 2009 7:09 am

    .. nica quotes but so many rude ,.. i lyk it per0h pur0h mga 2ngqkol ,.. sa sex d man lang icpn na nakqa2bast0sz na cgeh anyway ung ibva mgnda .. sna nxtym u can creat simple joke quotes not in sex . thnx

  16. jonalyn on October 7th, 2009 3:44 am

    wow! anep ka2tawa talga!! ahahah

  17. geo on October 9th, 2009 7:06 pm

    moooore!
    haha
    very nice :)

  18. dwayne on October 19th, 2009 1:50 am

    maganda halos

    swak na swak

    i want more

    ehhehe

  19. funny on November 14th, 2009 4:51 am

    its so funny very much hehehehehe

  20. makmak on December 6th, 2009 7:44 pm

    korni naman..

  21. makmak on December 6th, 2009 7:45 pm

    okie din nman ,,

  22. jhobellene on December 7th, 2009 12:08 am

    ganda naman nang quotes nyo…pwede paki dagdag naman….♥♥♥☼☼

  23. nonelsebutme on January 3rd, 2010 7:32 am

    whee..ganda naman….

    dagdag pa po kau….

  24. shyregil on January 11th, 2010 6:53 pm

    whahahah!!!!!!!!! i enjoyed much sa jokes

  25. michael on January 18th, 2010 7:16 pm

    wow!!astig mga quotes nyo!!ang korni!!

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